Oscar Wilde

Oscar Wilde said  "Most people are other people.  Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation."

He was never one for holding back.  And though I hate to admit it, that quote makes me squirm!  I know I've been guilty of mimicking in order to fit in, be accepted, not stand out.  I know I've adopted others' opinions before, not even knowing what my own were at the time.  And my passions?  When I look back on my life, I can see it's taken me a while to discover where mine lay.  Thanks Oscar!

 It is true, it's easy to go along with the crowd and do what everyone else is doing, think the popular thought, tread the path most trod, not question too much, not think too much, keep busy, keep partying, use drugs, become numb ... do anything but stop and look.  Because it requires great bravery, firstly to begin the journey of self-discovery, to get to know who we really are; and then secondly to be able to express it comfortably, to just be ourselves. 

Self-awareness can be the most difficult thing we face, downright scary in fact.  Not least because when we do begin we don't always like what we find.  It isn't always pretty, and it can be painful.  Oh God, can't I just pretend that bit doesn't exist?  I don't like that bit!  Can't we just skip to the good part?  Hmmm no, not really.  As Buddhism says the principal subject of contemplation is the self.  We need to take a look inside.

Why?

Because it can bring out the best in us.  It can bring out the deeply satisfying qualities of more wisdom, more insight and more creativity.  Self-awareness means we have more choice in how we behave in every waking moment.  And having choice means we're not just reacting to whoever or whatever is pushing our buttons.  We're choosing to face the world in a manner that brings contentment, because we're being true to who we are.

Here's a little story that says it all really ...

Rabbi Zusya has a revelation on his deathbed.  He shares it with those friends keeping vigil at his bedside.  "In the next life, I shall not be asked: 'Why were you not more like Moses?'" he says.

"I shall be asked: 'Why were you not more like Zusya?'"

(Philosopher Martin Buber, in The Way of Man, from a Hasidic parable)

Or, to finish as we began, with Oscar.

"Be yourself, everyone else is already taken."

Have a wonderful Easter!